Do you know what keeps you stuck in a particular area of your life for so long?
As it turns out there are four ways you, me, and all of us get stuck in our life. I want to share with you what it is that gets you stuck and what you can do to get yourself unstuck.
First, it’s important for you to know there’s a part of you that really does want to change, move forward, and achieve some greater results.
Yet, there’s another part of you, that really doesn’t want to see change, and wants to keep you right where you are.
That part of you will want to sabotage your conversation, but it doesn’t tell you, ‘I’m here to sabotage.’
What is the sabotaging part of you that keeps you stuck?
Your current results are a perfect ‘outer’ reflection of your ‘inner’ paradigms. This is the sabotaging part of you that keeps you stuck.
Old paradigms are firmly established in phrases such as:
“It’s always been like this…”
“It’s so hard to…”
“I’ve never been able to…”
“I always do this…”
“I must…”
“I have to…”
“I can’t…”
Do you notice any familiar limiting beliefs here?
What is a paradigm?
Your paradigms are simple…they are a set of beliefs, feelings, and actions that shape your current results. Just like gravity they pull you to a familiar life. These limitations or paradigms practiced repetitively generate a pattern of habits that become your circumstances, experiences, and results. They act as an internal thermostatic setting in all aspects of your life.
How does a paradigm show up?
Your paradigms get installed kind of like how you install an operating system on your computer, but in your case, over months and years, through a series of life events.
You adopt your parent’s beliefs. You adopt beliefs from your education, cultural upbringing, and also ‘impactful events’ that shape your beliefs, and all your beliefs ultimately become your paradigms.
How does a paradigm derail you?
The paradigms are hurting or helping you with what you want to achieve in life. There are four D’s that paradigms use to draw you back to the familiar:
1. Distraction
There are distractions all around us. It’s easy to get yourself distracted by doing the laundry, working out, shopping, or checking your social media, and emails. You have a favorite way that you distract yourself from not getting started or completing a goal or project. I’ll bet you’ve been distracting yourself for so long that it is a habit just like brushing your teeth.
2. Delay
Many different types of delay attempt to stop you in your tracks. Now isn’t the time and you’re waiting for the perfect time to get started. Or, you decide you’ll work on your task later because you’re too busy and you think you’ll have more time in the future. However, in reality, there’s never a better time than now.
3. Dissuasion.
You feel like you’ll never accomplish your goal so you talk yourself out of it.
This can happen before you get started or when you’re in the middle of something and you abandon it. Roadblocks are inside and outside of you and they’ll do anything to get you to turn away.
4. Disaster.
Some paradigms happen unexpectedly. Imagine the world you know is gone and the ground you’re standing on is shaking. You feel tremendous pain. This experience is a strong emotional negative impact like an accident, illness, loss of a loved one, or a relationship.
I want to mention to you that on a positive note, good experiences like having a baby and getting married are big paradigm shifters as well.
How do you change a paradigm?
I think it’s important to understand, that as you evolve, you’re always leaving one paradigm for the next (new) pattern of life. People get stuck and stay stuck through a lack of awareness. I want my clients to develop a ‘user-friendly’ relationship with their paradigms.
The key is to have a higher awareness than what you already have.
Your level of awareness can expand to any level. You can grow exponentially when you’re willing to change your thinking and move to a higher frequency of the results you would love. Essentially, you’re bridging a gap between the current life and the new greater life with more freedom and flow.
Now, how do you expand your awareness?
Your level of awareness expands and grows with effective education and a proper structure of support like professional coaching over a reasonable period of time.
In order to do this, you must develop the capacity for ‘paradigm awareness’ so you’re able to notice if your thoughts, feelings, or actions are not in alignment with your vision.
Then, when you ‘notice’ that the experience is not congruent with your vision, this is the opportunity for you to re-pattern the limiting paradigm and install a new expansive and empowering paradigm in its place.
The new results you create are a perfect reflection of the new level of awareness. It’s an ‘inside-out’ job.
At times, taking actions to serve new paradigms can feel new and a bit unsettling. But as you grow out of the comfort zone of the old paradigm, you establish a new ‘set point’ on your success thermostat.
The great news is that you can experience signs and signals of growth as you navigate the fearful gap. You can interrupt and install new paradigms, get unstuck, and stay on track with your dreams.
Here’s to shifting your paradigms!
Do you need support in shifting your paradigms and designing your dreams and goals? In between my coaching and speaking schedule, I carve out a few strategy sessions each month. If you would like a complimentary strategy session (Value = $250), simply contact me here.
As a Transformational Life Coach, Wendy Johnson helps people who are struggling to create a life they love where they wake up every day on purpose with joy and inner peace. She’s passionate about teaching clients to unlock their true potential, achieve success, and live a life they love living. Wendy is an inspiring speaker, a passionate educator, and a highly sought-after transformational coach.
