Have you ever gone down the wrong path with your words and actions and wished you hadn’t gone there? And now you find yourself at an intersection in life feeling angry, hurt or sad because you know the journey to get back on track is not going to be an easy one. When we’re at an intersection in life one of the most difficult things we have to do over and over again is to forgive and love ourselves and others while feeling hurt.
“The most difficult person to forgive maybe yourself,” says Doug Easterday, “because you were there when you made mistakes, and you remember your attitude and the inappropriate things you have done, said, or even thought. But forgiving yourself is such an important arena. It means that you choose to walk in the higher realm.”
Forgiveness and compassion are processes we choose to do to free ourselves from bitterness. Forgiveness is a shift in perception that allows us to see things differently. A Course of Miracles says that “Forgiveness is a shift in perception that removes a block in me to my awareness of love’s presence.”. And it goes on to say, “Every act is either an expression of love or a call for love regardless of how unskillful it may seem.”.
We’ve all had an experience of betrayal by a spouse, partner, friend, family member, or co-worker. And no doubt we have to admit we’ve betrayed ourselves, others, and even our own bodies. When we find ourselves in this circumstance, we get to choose how we’re going to use this painful experience to empower us to find compassion, love, and forgiveness.
How do we know we have forgiven someone who has betrayed us? When the person walks through the streets of our own mind and we have nothing but compassion for them.
It’s helpful to remind ourselves that when we were children we learned to walk by falling down and we got ourselves right back up and attempted to take another step. As we continued to practice falling and getting up we got better with each step we took. The same goes with compassion and forgiveness, we are going to get better at it the more we practice it.
Here are seven steps to forgiveness:
1. Take a deep breath and ask your higher power to direct, guide, and lead your forgiveness practice.
2. Give thanks in advance for the healing and letting go this brings to you.
3. Acknowledge and honor the pain you are feeling.
4. Be honest with how you feel. Write your feelings down in a journal. Talk with a few trusted people about your experience.
5. Create the space of forgiveness and be willing to release the feelings of hurt to allow yourself to be healed.
6. Ask your Higher Power, to help you see this situation or person differently.
7. Come up with a prayer or statement to forgive the person, the situation, and yourself.
Enjoy your journey!
If you need support in discovering and building your dreams and goals? In between my coaching and speaking schedule, I carve out a few strategy sessions each month. If you would like a complimentary strategy session (Value = $250), simply contact me here or email me at wendy@ontraclifecoaching.com.
As a certified Life Coach, Wendy Johnson helps people who are feeling stuck in fear, doubt and worry get back on track during a stressful life transition and create a life they love where they wake up every day with joy, purpose, and confidence. She’s passionate about teaching clients to unlock their true potential, achieve success and live a life they love living. Wendy is an inspiring speaker, passionate educator, and a highly sought-after transformational coach.
